Thursday, June 22, 2006
My First Movie Review Template
This was the first template I used to review movies, but have since modified it. Nevertheless for the sake of history, I'm posting this one here.
Spoiler-free plot synopsis: I hate spoilers. I don’t want to know anything about any tv show, book, movie or sporting event until I’m watching it unfold before my eyes. This has proved to be one of the only downsides to owning Tivo. By the way, if you don’t own Tivo, you might as well just throw a brick through your TV and put yourself out of your misery. And I’m not talking about a “dvr” I’m talking about Tivo. There is no substitute. I will not argue about this. Just accept it.Anyway, now I watch almost nothing “live” on TV. The only problem with that is that sometimes I fall behind on a popular show like 24 or Lost and then have to constantly guard against anyone who might talk or write about what happened in some episode I haven’t seen yet. My brothers and wife openly mock how turbo I am about this, but in my mind, as with most things, I’m right and they’re the crazy ones.
I admit it, I am hung up about spoilers more than most, but I’m not alone here by any means. Why then, do movie critics write movie reviews that are almost entirely made up of a description of what happens in the movie? (and don’t get me started about previews…I feel another post coming on) To be sure, explaining why you thought a movie was good or bad requires some discussion of the plot points or story, but most reviews these days are two sentences up front glowing about or trashing the movie followed by 10 paragraphs of what happens in the movie and ended with a single line saying the movie was either great or not. How is that helpful to we the people?
It’s not, of course, but it also requires precious little thought, making it a very appealing formula. I will strive to avoid that when reviewing movies here. I’m not going to give anything away and won’t spend any more time than necessary reporting on what happened in the movie. I’m also going to try to follow the template you see below so that I can make sure to discuss the various aspects I find important about movie watching. Maybe I will add or subtract from this list and maybe I will see how long it makes the reviews and get rid of it, but for now I will stick with it.
I don’t want to give stuff away, but I will spend a bit of time explaining what the movie is basically about so you can determine if subject matter alone might leave you wanting or not wanting to watch this movie and so you can understand the rest of the review.
Advertising/Expectations: In this section I will tell you a little about what I expected going in as I think that greatly influences whether you end up liking a movie. If you think it is going to be like Godfather II and it ends up like Godfather III, then an otherwise good movie becomes a great disappointment. I will also say a bit, when applicable about the advertising for the movie and whether it properly prepares you for what you get when you get to the theater/living room.
Storytelling: A movie has to have a good story, but then it also has to tell it well. Here is where I will talk about how the movie made use of the scenes and actors to get across the story and whether the story was worth telling in the first place.
Acting/Casting: Acting is crucial. Haden Christianson’s groundbreaking performance as a young Darth Vader in the newest Star Wars movies would have ruined those movies all by himself if Lucas hadn’t so badly wanted to get in on the act with his nearly as bad writing and directing. Truly the worst performance by an actor I have ever seen given the circumstances. But casting is almost as important so I will sometimes discuss that here as well. The LOTR trilogy was next level good because everyone in it matched what was described in the books so well. Likewise, sometimes great actors can hurt a movie by being miscast, like Jack Black in King Kong.
Writing: When it comes down to it, this is the most important factor in most movies. The words have to ring true. They have to be dramatic without being hokey. They have to be familiar enough to draw us in and different enough to keep us interested. The Cohens are masters. Fargo, Raising Arizona, The Big Libowski…great, great stuff. I am a harsh critic of the writing because there is so little that is good and it carries or destroys most movies. If you find yourself asking “why would he have said that” or laughing at a line meant to be serious, that one thing can kill some movies.
Directing: In some ways the Director is really ultimately responsible for everything, but I’m going to limit this section to how well the scenes worked, whether the actors were allowed to do their jobs, how the movie was edited or put together and comments about the general art of movie making.
Visuals: This is all about the look and feel and will include special effects, sets, stunts, locations, camera angles, etc.
Sound: This is both “track” and “effects.” The music and the noise. If you like movies and watch them at home you owe it to yourself and your poor needy family to get yourself a decent sound system and then turn it up until the sub-woofer shakes the whole house, then turn it up again until you have been visited by law enforcement at least twice.
Need for Screen: This section is how important it is that you see a movie on the big screen. After kids, the theater was more of a rare treat than a regular date, so in case you find yourself in the same situation, I’ll try to help you decide when it is worth springing for the world’s most valuable corn and when you can safely wait for video.
Gut feel: This is how a movie makes you feel when you first finish watching. Before you have a chance to really think about it or break it down, how did it make you feel? Sometimes, bad movies still leave you feeling good like Independence Day and sometimes good movies leave you feeling violated, like Monster’s Ball.
Who you should bring: Who you watch a movie with can sometimes be the single biggest factor in determining whether you like a movie. Imagine watching “There’s Something About Mary” with your father or mother-in-law. Would you have still thought it was hilarious when you were having to feign disgust at every sketchy scene? This factor is especially true for comedies. If you watch with other people who think the movie is funny, you are going to enjoy that movie a lot more. This is a much underrated movie watching factor. Choose your movie-mates very carefully if possible.
1-10 Score: My whole number scale and what it means is in a previous post, so you should check it out if you haven’t already.
Spoiler-free plot synopsis: I hate spoilers. I don’t want to know anything about any tv show, book, movie or sporting event until I’m watching it unfold before my eyes. This has proved to be one of the only downsides to owning Tivo. By the way, if you don’t own Tivo, you might as well just throw a brick through your TV and put yourself out of your misery. And I’m not talking about a “dvr” I’m talking about Tivo. There is no substitute. I will not argue about this. Just accept it.Anyway, now I watch almost nothing “live” on TV. The only problem with that is that sometimes I fall behind on a popular show like 24 or Lost and then have to constantly guard against anyone who might talk or write about what happened in some episode I haven’t seen yet. My brothers and wife openly mock how turbo I am about this, but in my mind, as with most things, I’m right and they’re the crazy ones.
I admit it, I am hung up about spoilers more than most, but I’m not alone here by any means. Why then, do movie critics write movie reviews that are almost entirely made up of a description of what happens in the movie? (and don’t get me started about previews…I feel another post coming on) To be sure, explaining why you thought a movie was good or bad requires some discussion of the plot points or story, but most reviews these days are two sentences up front glowing about or trashing the movie followed by 10 paragraphs of what happens in the movie and ended with a single line saying the movie was either great or not. How is that helpful to we the people?
It’s not, of course, but it also requires precious little thought, making it a very appealing formula. I will strive to avoid that when reviewing movies here. I’m not going to give anything away and won’t spend any more time than necessary reporting on what happened in the movie. I’m also going to try to follow the template you see below so that I can make sure to discuss the various aspects I find important about movie watching. Maybe I will add or subtract from this list and maybe I will see how long it makes the reviews and get rid of it, but for now I will stick with it.
I don’t want to give stuff away, but I will spend a bit of time explaining what the movie is basically about so you can determine if subject matter alone might leave you wanting or not wanting to watch this movie and so you can understand the rest of the review.
Advertising/Expectations: In this section I will tell you a little about what I expected going in as I think that greatly influences whether you end up liking a movie. If you think it is going to be like Godfather II and it ends up like Godfather III, then an otherwise good movie becomes a great disappointment. I will also say a bit, when applicable about the advertising for the movie and whether it properly prepares you for what you get when you get to the theater/living room.
Storytelling: A movie has to have a good story, but then it also has to tell it well. Here is where I will talk about how the movie made use of the scenes and actors to get across the story and whether the story was worth telling in the first place.
Acting/Casting: Acting is crucial. Haden Christianson’s groundbreaking performance as a young Darth Vader in the newest Star Wars movies would have ruined those movies all by himself if Lucas hadn’t so badly wanted to get in on the act with his nearly as bad writing and directing. Truly the worst performance by an actor I have ever seen given the circumstances. But casting is almost as important so I will sometimes discuss that here as well. The LOTR trilogy was next level good because everyone in it matched what was described in the books so well. Likewise, sometimes great actors can hurt a movie by being miscast, like Jack Black in King Kong.
Writing: When it comes down to it, this is the most important factor in most movies. The words have to ring true. They have to be dramatic without being hokey. They have to be familiar enough to draw us in and different enough to keep us interested. The Cohens are masters. Fargo, Raising Arizona, The Big Libowski…great, great stuff. I am a harsh critic of the writing because there is so little that is good and it carries or destroys most movies. If you find yourself asking “why would he have said that” or laughing at a line meant to be serious, that one thing can kill some movies.
Directing: In some ways the Director is really ultimately responsible for everything, but I’m going to limit this section to how well the scenes worked, whether the actors were allowed to do their jobs, how the movie was edited or put together and comments about the general art of movie making.
Visuals: This is all about the look and feel and will include special effects, sets, stunts, locations, camera angles, etc.
Sound: This is both “track” and “effects.” The music and the noise. If you like movies and watch them at home you owe it to yourself and your poor needy family to get yourself a decent sound system and then turn it up until the sub-woofer shakes the whole house, then turn it up again until you have been visited by law enforcement at least twice.
Need for Screen: This section is how important it is that you see a movie on the big screen. After kids, the theater was more of a rare treat than a regular date, so in case you find yourself in the same situation, I’ll try to help you decide when it is worth springing for the world’s most valuable corn and when you can safely wait for video.
Gut feel: This is how a movie makes you feel when you first finish watching. Before you have a chance to really think about it or break it down, how did it make you feel? Sometimes, bad movies still leave you feeling good like Independence Day and sometimes good movies leave you feeling violated, like Monster’s Ball.
Who you should bring: Who you watch a movie with can sometimes be the single biggest factor in determining whether you like a movie. Imagine watching “There’s Something About Mary” with your father or mother-in-law. Would you have still thought it was hilarious when you were having to feign disgust at every sketchy scene? This factor is especially true for comedies. If you watch with other people who think the movie is funny, you are going to enjoy that movie a lot more. This is a much underrated movie watching factor. Choose your movie-mates very carefully if possible.
1-10 Score: My whole number scale and what it means is in a previous post, so you should check it out if you haven’t already.
# posted by Josh Stump : 8:53 PM
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