StumpTown Entertainment

So, I finally get around to writing something about TV since the new Fall season just started and almost as soon as I write it, everything changes and it’s out of date. So for the good of the 3.5 people who might read this, I feel compelled to offer an update. So, here’s some additional thoughts on TV and the new fall season.

You may have noticed that for years now there is a strange copycat phenomenon that happens in Hollywood. Every couple years there will be a movie on some random subject matter that sounds interesting and seems worth seeing and then you hear just days later that there is another movie coming out with virtually the identical subject matter. Just the ones I can think of off the top of my head include: a couple years ago there were two volcano disaster movies; 2 asteroids headed toward earth movies; two movies about Columbus; two drill to the center of the earth movies; two movies about cops who are partners except for one is straight laced and by the book and the other one is a rule snubbing maverick (not the basketball team), they both argue with their African American police chief as they fight against Asian drug lords preferably referred to as the “triad” or “triads” (no one in Hollywood is sure if there are more than one), actually at least 2 of these movies get made every year.


The explanation I have heard for this phenomenon is really quite simple if not rather pathetic. Apparently, it works like this: One studio gets a hold of a great script that is new and fresh and gets a good buzz going. Big time directors and stars are interested and the “industry” starts getting all hyped up. A rival studio then sees an opportunity to cash in on all this free buzz and publicity and pays extra for a different big director and different big name stars. If you notice, when you have these double movies, they almost always both feature bankable stars. The copycat film studio knows their movie will suck. I mean, it is just a rip off of something else and gets thrown together quickly, so how could it not? Because they know they will suck, they rush their movie to get to theaters fast and first. It doesn’t matter if it is good, it just needs to have big stars, enough decent material to put together a good trailer and the buzz generated by the second movie which inevitably gets blended into the copycat. Then the first one comes out, does OK and usually takes an audience away from the real movie which is usually much, much better.


I mean, you probably already either figured this out or at least assumed it couldn’t be coincidence. But it is at least conceivable that two people just happened to think a giant space rock headed toward earth to wipe us all out dino-style might make for some cool special effects and a profitable movie. So, how do I know that it isn’t just coincidence when this happens? First, I know because it always plays out just as I described above in terms of one movie sucking and one being good. Second, I know because this year there are mysteriously two movies about magicians set in the 1800s or thereabout where there is mystery and intrigue and heavily waxed mustaches. I think the odds of two different people coming up with that concept for a movie at the precise same moment in time are roughly the same as me becoming a huge Colin Farrell fan…in other words, less chance of surviving a space rock the size of Mt. Everest landing on you as you walk to work.

That means, of course, that only one of those movies is going to be good despite the fact that both have big stars and cool looking previews. Trust me, only one will be good, the second one. The first one, “The Illusionist” stars Ed Norton (one of my favorites) with the great Paul Giamatti and the easy on the eyes Jessica Biel. This movie already came out and even though I didn’t see it and still want to see it and definitely will see it eventually, I already know it will be hackish and bad. The second movie is “The Prestige” which stars Christian Bale (one of my favorites), Hugh Jackman (sans claws) and the even easier on the eyes Scarlett Johansen. That movie has a chance to be pretty dang good. Give it a chance even if you saw the other one and it was bad.

Now you’re thinking, “hey wait, I thought this was going to be about TV?” Well, I bring all this up to say, that this phenomenon happened in TV this year in almost identical fashion, except with “stars” who could only be considered big on TV. I’m guessing that someone in the Timothy Hutton fan club, proudly wearing their “Turk 182” T-Shirt, let slip that he was inked to do a hip new serial drama about a wealthy powerful family who has a family member get kidnapped and the plot takes strange and interesting turns as the good guys fight to get the victim back. So, Fox grabbed some guy with a nice face who couldn’t act to go with a bunch of guys you recognize but can’t place, like a doctor from ER and Penelope Anne Miller who looks like she has borrowed Star Jones’ hips (ok, that was a cheap shot, I apologize, writing about entertainment stuff makes me catty I guess). They rush to make a rip off kidnapping show so they can get theirs on the air first.

Well, that show became Vanished and as I mentioned in the last post, I got sucked in and started watching it and am still watching it even though it is really fairly lame. They did just replace the nice face with a guy who can act a bit, so I’m sticking with it for a bit longer. The good show, that came after, even though I guarantee it was the original, was called “Kidnapped” and just got cancelled. So, when I told you to pick Kidnapped if you haven’t picked one yet and you want to watch a show about kidnapping that doesn’t have Anthony Lapaglia in it, you can leave hateful comments to this post for the terrible advice.


Staying with the “shows that got cancelled” theme., you might recall that I named Smith as the best new show on TV. I almost wrote that it is so good that it is sure to be cancelled. But my doctor has asked me to cut my cynicism in half which is still roughly 3 times the recommended daily allowance, so I didn’t say anything even though I was thinking, this show is actually pretty good, I bet it gets cancelled. Why would I think that? Am I just a pessimist of the first order? Of course not, I couldn’t make it out of the 3rd order, but also I just know that the people in American television believe that the American audience is really, really stupid and they believe that regardless of how good a show is or how bad a time slot is, if the show doesn’t explode on to the scene like Lost or Alias did, then there is no way anyone in America will figure out that it is worth watching and yet a 7th installment of CSI is not. This is irrefutable fact. I know because I’m a lawyer and get paid to refute things and use words like “irrefutable” in non-legal conversations as if normal people would ever do that. So, I know irrefutable and this is as irrefutable as it gets. So there. Convinced? I’m guessing you already were.

So, of course, Smith got cancelled. How on earth is “My Name is Earl” still on the air? I mean it is good and funny and smart (even while being stupid). I can’t believe they brought it back. They better be careful, if it goes on much longer it will become a runaway hit and a huge success.

I watched the first few episodes of “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip” which was apparently named by the owner of the “California Angels of Anaheim brought to you by Orange County in conjunction with Long Beach.” Here’s my take. I think I enjoyed this show more when it was called West Wing and it was in its first season. I mean, the writing, acting, directing, story lines are so much like West Wing it is a like trying to find the difference between the hook of Queen’s “Under Pressure” and Vanilla Ice’s “Ice Ice Baby.” Except now, instead of the White House, it is the set of a show that is exactly like Saturday Night Live. The problem is, that everyone still acts like they are running the most powerfull nation on earth instead of a sketch comedy show. This show, in addition to feeling warn out before it even gets going because it is so much like a show we’ve already seen, takes itself waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too seriously. It is about a comedy sketch show and the people who make it go and nothing funny happens. Come to think of it, that makes it pretty much like the real SNL, but I don’t think that’s the intended goal. The writing is good and sharp and Matthew Perry is really, really good playing a slightly more serious and stressed out Chandler from the first season of Friends….when he was still funny. But good acting and writing are not enough to save this show from a seriously flawed premise. I don’t care what happens behind the scenes of SNL and even if I did, I wouldn’t believe this was an accurate depiction. And I write a whole blog dedicated to entertainment stuff. So, how is a normal person going to get into this show? I don’t think they will and I think this show isn’t going to make it.

Also, I’m done watching it. I’m going to check in with my lovely wife, but unless she really wants to keep watching, I’m taking it off the Tivo list. It isn’t just because of the criticism above, it is because the show’s agenda is too obvious and it is an unwelcome distraction from the entertainment. In the first season of West Wing, they took their shots at Bush and Republicans and even when they would bring in a character to offer an alternative point of view, it was obviously a show with an agenda to the left of center. That was fine because they didn’t trot it out every week and beat us over the head with it and the writing and acting was so fresh and good, it still made for a great show. Then the real presidential race started and the show couldn’t help itself. They dropped any veil still slightly masking its pointedly liberal agenda and turned into little more than well crafted propaganda. Laying my cards on the table, I’m a registered Republican and I’m sure that’s part of what soured me on the show. But more than that was I felt insulted that the show started taking its mission so seriously as to assume I would actually get my political opinions right from Martin Sheen. It was obnoxious and patronizing.

Well, Studio 60 skipped right to the 3rd season in that regard with its anti conservative agenda. Every episode takes some shot at “the Christian Right.” Like in West Wing, they are smart about it and always do it in such a way that you think, “aw, they’re just being tongue in cheek” or “one of their characters is a Christian and they actually showed people praying, so they are being fair.” I don’t care if they are fair. It’s entertainment, they are welcome to use the show to forward any agenda they want to pursue. I’m glad they have that right. That said, I don’t really care to get preached at while I’m watching a drama as it tries to jam an anti-Christian, anti-conservative message down my throat while pretending to be about a sketch comedy show. Plus, did I mention it is about comedians and it is never funny? And it has DL Hughly who has never been funny a day in his life…ever.

So, I’m going to skip the sermon and lament that a lot of good acting and writing is going to waste. I will take solace, however, in the knowledge that the show has such an obvious level of quality in its production that it is sure to get cancelled.

I have to say this to the makers of the new show “Heroes” who I like to pretend read my blog. STOP TELLING US EXACTLY WHAT IS HAPPENING AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN WITH VOICE OVERS AND PREVIEWS AND ENDLESS STUPID NARRATION!!!!! They have about ruined a promising show by laying out for us not only what is going on now with events that are only interesting if they contain enough mystery to tempt our imagination to engage, but they insist on giving us weekly previews of the entire season which maps out for you where the show is going. Why would I still want to watch if I already know what happens? Ugh. It’s a decent show really with a fun premise (stolen from X-Men), but having the narrator tell you, “this is the bad guy, stay with us to see him do these bad things, for these motives, with this hidden agenda against all these people in the following order,” is destroying the show. I’m sticking with it for now, but I’m concerned. I haven’t watched tonight’s episode yet, so no spoilers in the comments please…as if there were some left. My lovely wife insightfully pointed out, while I was ranting and raving about this, that it is likely this way so the show doesn’t become an early victim if people aren’t willing to invest, but removing our imagination from the equation is not the way to build a following. Don’t believe me? Check the popularity of Lost or tell me whether or not people watched the X-Files.

Ok, I think that’s it for now. I still haven’t seen The Nine or Six Degrees, though they are piling up on my Tivo. Hopefully, at least one of them will be decent and no one will tell the TV execs, so it has some small chance of staying on the air.